Voices from Within

I missed (skip) the whole week of lessons!

Friday, September 26, 2008

*knock*

Alright, I know I should not do so... but it's really tiring. I'm still recovering from the sleep-less chalet I guess. Planning for chalet and 'maintaining' it was really not a fun thing, but more like a chore rather. (zzz)

Thanks dear for being so so helpful during those few days, chauffeuring around with errands and maintaining the BBQ pit: it must have been tiring for you too.

Love you lots lots lots! :-)

School school school: So not motivated at all.

The heart's cold, it's just another beautiful mistake. 10:59 PM

Travis 1st Birthday

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Celebration from: 19th Sept 2008 to 21st Sept 2008 (Fri to Sun)

Cake cutting on: 19th Sept 2008 @ 8.30pm
Venue: Costa Sands Resort @ Pasir Ris

Applied leave to help Sis to do the preparation on Friday, and we are so gonna go for marketing tomorrow for darling Travis BIG day!

The heart's cold, it's just another beautiful mistake. 10:52 PM

Flash back memories

Friday, September 12, 2008

I made my way to the new college at Middle road and memories flashes back while passing by the familiar building icons around it.

- IOI Building - previous office for my part-time tele-sales job

- Rochor Beancurd - usual supper after work for my family

- Chicken rice coffee shop - always wanted to try but never once did

- New Zi char stall - replaces my fish soup zi char stall for supper

- 56 bus stop - favorite bust stop with direct service to my Bishan home

- Rex 7-Eleven - beverage & snack shop before I hope onto bus

- Old Chang Kee (Opp Rex) - 1st OCK! Nice curry puffs beside the ice-skating place (no longer exist) when I was really young.

- TCC @ Paradiz Center - late chill out coffee house (under renovation)

Those were the times and easily, it could be two years back. Apart from the full-time job I held from 9am-6pm I was working part-time from 7pm to 11pm for an international call card company that uses Multi level Marketing (MLM) for their core business. Thanks to Kenny Zhang as it was through his recommendation that his cousin got me this job :)

It was tiring but I was really satisfied with the arrangements. Though work almost took up the whole pie of my personal time, it was worth it! Income was less tight, new colleagues made, understood company politics, learnt how to deal with foreign prospects and many others through sharing sessions. I was really young then... :p

Due to increased work responsibilities for day-time job and commcement of studies in the next few months, I moved on. Far too much then what I can handle... didn't know how I performed but came out of it eventually, with an end to a close to 6 months of hysterical training, I started another commitment - Full&Part time again - Education~

I have never stopped my pace since graduation from poly. My diploma is useless in the past, and it is till date. I felt like an 'O' level grad... 好累。

The heart's cold, it's just another beautiful mistake. 12:42 AM

Semester begins: 09 Sept 08

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

How time passed!

Just as I was still staying up late few months back for exams, bringing myself back at work, settling down & getting busy... semester got to start.

Good news: I have passed all the 4 modules. Yeah... (wish list checked)

Life will so gonna be the same from tomorrow onwards:
Work-School-Eat-Sleep and there goes my entertainment.

Come to think of it, I have been rather good during my term break.

No- I didn't play MJ every weekend
No- I didn't party nor club (May i say not at all? hmm.)
No- I didn't stay up late playing games
No- I didn't do anything crazy and out of the ordinary

I had my daily routine at work, family, relationship, a little indulgence chasing HK drama serial. Kinda regret that I didn't party my way through for the past few months! Arrgh... 生活好没乐趣！

I will be making my way to school tomorrow after work, feeling excited as I had my set of stationery packed months ago and got another 'secondary school A4 exercise book' for notes; yet reluctant and really unwilling to start the whole cycle again :(

I have met another milestone of my journey and passing the exam was indeed a great accomplishment on a personal note. I wished I could be given a chance to think through things again. The society is not as simple as I thought... looking back, I did not regret but was speechless for everything.

I was too naive for such a commitment which was always a weigh in my heart. To my friend - we will walk this through together and don't give up yet. You have a choice right on your hands to make your own fate, don't misuse this privilege.

The heart's cold, it's just another beautiful mistake. 2:07 AM

New campus - Ex SIC building

Friday, September 5, 2008

Been checking out for the latest news at college website for results and timetable diligently and got to know that college has moved to a new place due to renovations to the ex-SIC building at Middle road.

The new location is not new to me and in fact, it is now nearer to my office and I'd get to save the bus fare as it is within walking distance.

Looking forward for good start... told myself to focus on my studies few months back if faithful readers can recall. But... guess it's gonna be empty promises again. Will it?

hmm!

The heart's cold, it's just another beautiful mistake. 11:22 PM

Complicated

Monday, September 1, 2008

I was about to end my day with grievances to bed but while reading news, I chanced upon an article that strike my blogging urge. It was too similar... and here you go for the next chapter of my journey.

Was kinda amused by how one can be so self-centered... maybe it's not that but more of to each of its own? I never understand why a line must always be drawn when the ultimate objective is the same.

All I need is an answer to close the case, is it that difficult?
I never thought of asking you to do it
I just wanted a guide on how to handle
Just needed your reassurance
I could have replied without going through you
but I thought I should.
I approached you for advice
Yet you rebutted me so defensively

Even end up with sarcastic remarks over an email that is not even meant to be sent to you over the same matters. It was already in such simplified form and was asked to simplify on what is the email trying to hint and that you are too lazy to guess, what's going on? I swear, I don't play politics and it's a mere formal email that was never meant to be a riddle. Why worry when you have confidence over your duties? No one is lifting their finger...

Never expected this to come out from your mouth and yes, "God gave us a mouth to eat and talk." Such a wonderful example cited. You have once again made me doubt my capability in such a short span. Yes, I am wearing a hat too big and perhaps, I really failed my duties which you have to take up the jobs that I can't handle. It's time to move, I guess...

Have you changed? or it's me? It's me who can't understand why you have to draw a fine line over such matters... I know you are tired, but I am more tired if we are always going about in circles.

While I am still drown with my anger, I chanced upon this article. I did the mentioned but why aren't the treatment that I received the same? I stood back and I rethink, what makes you said that? I can't think of one... I didn't ask for anything, I understood your situation and all I want to know is the process and updates of it so that I can explain... why so? Sigh~

Don't worry, I'm not gonna leave this matter close as it is. I will never do that... when the time is ripe, I'll definitely talk about it. For I don't believe this is the truth, don't vent your anger on me man...

Spoke to J for quite awhile today... Hope it helps to solve some of your concerns though I'm not to best person to justify.

I am angry... but I can't do anything.
I am irritated, but I still can't do anything.
At work and relationship, I can never find a place to settle down. Been floating and floating. Whenever I opened up the issues and wanting to solve it, I've got to wet my pillow to bed. Nothing can be done apart from sleeping, grumbling, attitude-ing, waking, eating, ignorance is the best gift and I will, choose to be ignorance. Being an idiot is still, better than better stubborn.

The heart's cold, it's just another beautiful mistake. 11:11 PM